If you need a stereotypical asian voice,

Give me a call.
GHOSTBUSTERS!

Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition! [He slashes a large V through a propaganda poster.] The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. [giggles] Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me "V".

This cool pair of shoes make me get all the ladies at school.
It not only makes me walk on water,
or turn water into whiskey! No sir!

Jesus Walks on Water. I walk on Jesus.

She killed Kurt.

There I was....

At the age of 18, I stand on the pavement next to a rental car (for a long 30 minutes),

My proctor finally arrives! A man with a green shirt, jeans, a bag of fritoes in one hand, and the nametag: Larry. This moment shall be with me forever!

We get into the car, and here comes some dialogue:
P - SUPER INSTRUCTION MAN! LARRY
S - Me
C - Cat

P: Start your engine up. (*munch munch*)
S: Alright.
P: Do you want a piece of gum?
S: No.
P: How about some music?
S: No.
P: Alright, then let's make a turn here...

So we drive for three minutes, i pass my parallel parking exam, and we start going back to the DMV (Dept. of Motor Vehicles).

P: Alright, everything passes, and you are good to go.
S: ...Holy *poop*!
C: MEROWwww....*thunk thunk*
S: Should I stop?!?
P: No, there's people behind us. Keep driving.

I look in my rearview mirror.
C: *the cat is rolling* *another thunk*

And we get back. And I fail.

"3 miles over the speed limit and Didn't stop before a stop sign.....was doing well until he hit that cat"

WHAT THE HELL!

R.I.P. That Cat that made me fail that Driving Exam.

How you doing?